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Dinnae Mak Me Laugh
by Matthew Fitt
Don’t laugh or giggle, not even a wee bit, at Matthew Fitt reading his own poem.
Oh, dinnae mak me laugh.
See that cloon mask on yer face?
Please gonnae tak it aff.
And dinnae tell that rotten joke again,
Please – no on ma behalf.
And tak yer punders aff yer heid –
Ye look like a giraffe!
See the day? Whitever ye dae,
Jist dinnae mak me laugh.
Gonnae no mak me laugh.
Dinnae cloon aboot like a galoot,
Pick yer neb and ping it aff,
Stick yer tongue in puggie dung,
Sit fertin in the bath.
Screw the nut, wull ye?
Try no tae be a nyaff.
See the day? Whitever ye dae,
Jist dinnae mak me laugh.